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Submitted on
July 24, 2005
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The air was damp and smelled of bile,
The perfect place for a dying soul
She hid behind a plastic smile,
Pretending everything was under control

Months passed by, she'd stay at home
Adding new scars everyday
She'd get high, all alone
Too blind to see herself fade away

She thought everything
Would be just fine
Thinking to herself,
Just one more time

Just one more time,
I'll puke up my guts
Just one more pill,
Just one more cut
Just one more drink,
Just one more shot
Liquor and drugs
Are all I've got


Her eyes were black,
Her bones were weak
Each day got harder
To even speak

Years passed by, and she grew older
She still tries to get away
She lived a lie, her days grew colder
Breathing one less breath each day

Still thinking
Everything was fine
Still saying to herself,
Just one more time

Just one more finger down my throat,
Just one more needle in my vein
Just one more bump, just one more line
Just one more time to ease the pain
Just one more time, I'll hurt myself
My reflection is only here to taunt me
Just on more time, I'll starve myself
Just one more time to make him want me


Too busy trying
To be perfect
She couldn't see
It wasn't worth it

Constant vomitting,
And telling herself lies
Needle holes,
And bloodshot eyes
Alcohol,
A knife, and strife
Are all she ever
Knew in life

Her doctor told her she needed help
But she insisted she didn't need any
Eventually, she killed herself
One more time was one too many
This is a collaboration I did with I wrote the poem and she did the art. She is such a talented photographer, not to mention model as well:nod: Fullview the image please And give her gallery a visit, you won't be disappointed.
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:iconxsolox:
That was fantastic!!!
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:iconderkleinefreak:
oh my goodness ..... O.O
you make me speechless, honestly ... this is my absolute favourite i think ... it's just ... brilliant ... awesome .. sorry but i just don't know what to say. i can soo totally relate to it it's nearly scary. i've also been through the most of these things already and i'm 14 .. whatever all i can say is, that poem is probably the best i've ever read ... you're amazing!!!!!
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:icondarwolfsp:
A good poem to teach people about drug abuse. And you put it in perfect words!!! Yayy!
Reply
:iconthekingoffall:
TheKingofFall Jun 18, 2006   Writer
I don't much like the format of this poem. You use a lot of needless repetition and you have ineffective rhymes which really frustrate. There is absolutely no symbolism and your imagery is par at best. Also, a lot of your descriptive terms are overused and tired, and lessen any impact their meanings woulds have had you used a synonym.

I'd go through and revise this, because the poem has the potential to be good, it's just not there right now.
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:iconpeoplerstrange:
you are so amazing 0o. i totally look up to you for your photography. i can relate to alot of things you write.
Reply
:iconamaranthia:
the descriptive narrative of the poem really renders in the reader's mind the sort of process and experience the protagonist. I'm not sure about the image tho.. the girl is too beautiful and healthily voluptuous. Unless I'm totally missing the connection here ...
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:iconrandomperson37:
Wonderful again... I loved.. 'loved' the ending, and the whole poem. Amazing
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